Does every child have a weakness for junk foods? (1.4)

Beyond HUGE expectation, children in the NCU kindergarten really have strong awareness of unhealthy foods!

    The young responders, who are 5 or 6 years old, are composed of 10 boys and 8 girls.

    "I love McDonald's," two boys yelled. The rest answered,"NO!"

    "I know that McDonald's is junk food," some children in "NO" group said.
    
    To make sure their awareness, I questioned,"Would you like to eat unhealthy foods if I tell you that they make you stupid?" "NO!" all of them responded.

     A piece of news in Taipei Times on 23th of February suggested that too many unhealthy foods lower a child's IQ. The interview, for the original purpose of learning whether unhealthy foods play a threatening role in the children's daily lives, turns out to be a surprising discovery.

     There is no doubt that unhealthy foods exist for good and all in children's lives. But parents' worries about children's IQs are not needed. Clearly, they know that they are not supposed to eat junk foods!

Peers' response

1.the title

 a.The title is too specific. Replace 18 children with kindergartners if you want to make the issue general.

   b."Truth" is not specific. You should talk more about the news content in the title.

→(REJECTED) I agree with the advice that the title is too specific. But, replacing 18 children with kindergartners cannot make the title better. As for the second advice, the purpose of using "truth" is to make readers track down what the truth is. So, in order to connect the title with the subtitle, I make it a question.(The subtitle is the answer.) It is not specific any more but still arouses readers' interest toward my news.  

2.the subtitle

  Adding "out of our imagination" before the subtitle will be good.

→(REJECTED) "Out of our imagination" is a good phrase to raise readers' attention. But I think "beyond huge expectation" is more appropriate for my subtitle.

3.the structure

  Show the children's response first and then explain it.

→(ACCEPTED) It can raise readers' curiosity and makes them keep on reading.

4.words choosing

  Replace "are not needed" in the last paragraph with "are not necessary" because the latter is more professional.

→(REJECTED) There is no difference between "are not needed" and "are not necessary." Besides, the former seems more concise.

Does every child have a weakness for junk foods?(Final)

Beyond HUGE expectation, children in NCU kindergarten really have strong awareness of unhealthy foods!


    The young responders, who are 5 or 6 years old, are composed of 10 boys and 8 girls.

    "I love McDonald's," only 2 boys said. The rest answered,"NO!"

    "I know that McDonald's is junk food," some children in "NO" group noted.
    
    To make sure their awareness, I questioned,"Would you like to eat unhealthy foods if I tell you that they make you stupid?" "NO!" all of them responded.

     A piece of news in Taipei Times on 23th of February suggested that too many unhealthy foods lower a child's IQ. The interview, for the original purpose of learning whether unhealthy foods play a threatening role in the children's daily lives, turns out to be a surprising discovery.

     There is no doubt that unhealthy foods exist for good and all in children's lives. But parents' worries about children's IQs are not needed. Clearly, they know that they are not supposed to eat junk foods!

An unbelievable truth of the 18 children

The 18 children in NCU kindergarten really have strong awareness of unhealthy foods!

    A piece of news in Taipei Times on 23th of February suggested that too many unhealthy foods lower a child's IQ. An interview, for the original purpose of learning whether unhealthy foods play a threatening role in the children's daily lives, turns out to be a surprising discovery.

    The young responders, who are 5 or 6 years old, are composed of 10 boys and 8 girls.

    "I love McDonald's," only 2 boys said. The rest answered,"NO!"

    "I know that McDonald's is junk food," some children in "NO" group noted.
    
    To make sure their awareness, I questioned,"Would you like to eat unhealthy foods if I tell you that they make you stupid?" "NO!" all of them responded.

    There is no doubt that unhealthy foods exist for good and all in children's lives. But parents' worries about children's IQs are not needed. Clearly, they know that they are not supposed to eat junk foods!

Good news for the children in NCU kindergarten!

  It is promising for the IQs of the children in NCU kindergarten 
since they have strong awareness of unhealthy foods.

 On 23th of February,a piece of news in Taipei Times suggested 
that too many unhealthy foods lower a child's IQ. In order to find
out whether unhealthy foods play a threatening role in children's 
daily lives, I visited NCU kindergarten on 5th of March. 

        The content of the interview:  
    There are 18 children, who are 5 or 6 
  years old, joining this interview. 10 of 
  them often go out eating with their 
  parents. A boy mentioned his parents 
  took him to eat KFC and porridge; 
  another boy mentioned French fries
  and hamburgers; a girl and a boy 
  mentioned ordinary meals. When I 
  asked," Do you guys like  McDonald's?", 2
  of them said," Yes!" and the rest said, "
  NO!" Even more surprisingly, the children
  in "NO" group said that McDonald's is junk
  food. And then all the children said that
  they seldom eat McDonald's. Later, I asked
them ," What do you usually eat for snacks?" Most of them mentioned fruits such as tomatoes, strawberries and pears.In the end, I asked them," Will you still want to eat unhealthy foods if I tell you that these foods make you stupid?" They all answered "NO!"   

  

It is accepted that children cannot fully be avoided unhealthy foods in their daily lives. However, we still can make sure that the children in NCU kindergarten does not have to face mental crisis resulted from eating too many unhealthy foods. Because their parents realize seriousness of the crisis,and most importantly, so do these children! 

  

Watch what your children are eating!

Now that unhealthy foods put more crises in a child's life.
For now, being fat is not an urgent problem for your child any more.
His or her IQ should be given priority to worry about!

http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/lang/archives/2013/02/23/2003555454

Sources of the two pictures:
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/national/research-reveals-babies-on-junk-food-at-6-months/story-fndo471r-1226462741364

http://confessionsofafoodie.com/2012/03/29/live-long-by-eating-healthy/